A work client, whom I knew before I got married, called to ask me about some work stuff and we chatted.
I updated him of my second baby as he knew of my first baby. And he encouraged me to have more! I told him it’s difficult to have more children in present society as everything is so expensive. He even said I should think about quitting my job and be a SAHM.
He and his wife gave up a lot of things when they were young in order for his wife to stay home to look after their 2 children. He gave up golf etc. His wife gave up a job with good income and was not very happy initially to do so. But they decided that it’s either him or his wife to stay home for the children’s sake. They spent less but raised well behaved children.
He said it’s a right choice to have one parent to stay home to look after the children. And he said it’s good to have more children.
I agreed with him somehow.
I switched from my sales job in order to have more time with my girl, so that I can have family time on weekends. I thank God for my boy and I witnessed his first milestones which I missed out for my girl.
However, now I am back to work, with the increasing workload, I don’t get to see my children much on weekdays and I just want to rest on weekends. I am worried that I will miss out on their coming milestones.
I think about many of my friends who are SAHM. They post pictures of their children learning and playing. I thought of the last time I had uploaded their photos in FB. I only managed to upload in Instagram which posted the photos in FB.
They watch their children grow.
They teach their children manners.
They give in to their children but with a limit.
What my client said is true. When I came home from work, I was already so tired and I just gave in to my children’s demands, out of convenience. And my children will just cross the boundary and ask for more. And I can never take back.
This is a shocking truth when I learnt about it. Sometimes, you just need someone to remind you.
Nowadays, I don’t know how tall my girl is and I only know how long she is and I was caught by surprise how fast she grows. I only see her asleep when I got home from work. I only spent time playing with her on weekends. I hear her on weekdays night when she called me at work asking me to go home.
It’s sad but I guess this is what happening to many full time working mothers. But how many of us are willing to give up our job?
Like what my client said, you may have a 5 figure dual income salary coming in to your bank every month, but you miss out on your children’s life.
This is really something for many of us to ponder about.